After Charleston, our next stop was supposed to be Gatlinburg, which we had heard about before. On the way, we saw a submarine and a bit of the Great Smoky Mountains. But Gatlinburg was a surprise, and we wound up staying in Pigeon Forge. Not a problem since our goal was to go to Dollywood.
CSS Hunley Submarine
As we left Charleston to head back north, we made a final stop at the museum for the CSS Hunley submarine, the first combat submarine to sink a warship, the USS Housatonic. I enjoyed the small museum, which went into great detail about the development and operations of the Hunley by the Confederacy during the Civil War. Of course, it was pretty cool to see the actual vessel itself, even if it was submerged in liquid in order to preserve it.
The sub itself was quite small and propelled by men hunched inside, turning a crankshaft and propeller by hand. It sounds like a nightmare assignment to me. Over the course of the development in New Orleans, the Hunley sank twice, killing 13 sailors, including the developer Horace Hunley. The Confederate Navy raised the submarine both times.
By February of 1864, the Hunley had been moved to the Charleston Harbor, where the Union Navy was executing a crippling blockade. The submarine was pressed into its first and final combat mission, successfully sinking the USS Housatonic using a bomb attached to a pole arm sticking out of the bow of the boat. Unfortunately for the crew, they were unable to return to base when the vessel sank in the harbor after the attack.
Several failed searches for the Hunley were executed over the years. It wasn’t until 1970 that the wreck was finally found, but ownership remained in dispute for many years. Recovery only occurred in 2000, and the hull rests in a sodium hydroxide bath to prevent decay, making it a little difficult to see. Still, I enjoyed taking in an important part of naval history.
All I Will Say About Gatlinburg
After 7+ hours of driving, a couple meals and an unremarkable overnight stay in Greenville, SC, we arrived at our rental condo in Gatlinburg, TN. Gatlinburg sits in a large “hollow” or narrow canyon. Because of a nearby road closure, an unusually large amount of traffic was rerouted through the middle of town, causing substantial gridlock. The gridlock, in turn, gave us a long time to study what the town had to offer for our stay as we crawled along the road. We didn’t have any expectations prior to arrival.
What a dump! Arriving on Monday afternoon at the end of September, hardly what I would call high season, the place was packed with people milling about from T-shirt emporium to candy shop to mediocre restaurant. In addition, our condo was quite a bit less desirable than the pictures shown online. Staying here would be like living on the boardwalk in Atlantic City, if not worse. Not our cup of tea (that’s putting it mildly.) Thankfully, the condo was willing to refund our deposit because of the deceptive description. So, we had to find a place to stay that night.
Finding a New Hotel
Our plan for the next 5 nights, through Friday, was to spend time at the Dollywood Theme Park and check out the area, including nearby Smoky Mountains NP (which will be covered in another article). We chose to stay in Pigeon Forge, which had more accommodation choices and was closer to Dollywood.
When trying to book our stay, the rates were decent until Friday night, when we had a much higher rate. So, we decided to stay only 4 nights in Pigeon Forge and add an extra night to our next stop in Knoxville. Even better, when I rebooked the Knoxville stay, the price for the original 4 nights had gone down so much that we got the 5th night included for less than the prior total cost for 4 nights. Nice.
Fun in Pigeon Forge
Honestly, Pigeon Forge is not very different from Gatlinburg in style. We ogled buildings shaped like half of the Titanic and one built to look like it had toppled over. The Hollywood wax musuem had the Empire State Building with King Kong on top, swatting at a biplane. More T-shirt emporiums, cart driving tracks, and over a dozen mini golf courses. At least it was a bit more spread out, and there seemed to be some wider dining options.
One night, we took in the Hatfield and McCoy Dinner Feud show, which told the story of the famous feuding families. We chose to dine on the Hatfield side and wound up being seated with a guy named Hatfield, although he claimed to be no relation. It was a fun, campy evening of music, dancing, and bad jokes.
Amusement Park in a Shopping Mall
Continuing with the theme, one afternoon we went to check out The Island in Pigeon Forge, a local shopping mall cum amusement park. In addition to the T-shirts and dining, there was a flying theater, a Ferris wheel, laser tag, and… And… AND…
The Old Smoky Distillery, where we could sample moonshine. The company makes a couple of dozen liquors of varying strength. Some are sweet, sour, and creamy. They make moonshine-soaked pickles and fruit. It was the deluxe tasting, which was 8 thimbles of shine spanning their offerings. We tried some of the food soaked in shine too; we liked some, not others. We picked up a sampler to give to friends we saw later in our travels. Good times.
The Main Event – Dollywood
We like taking in amusement parks from time to time, and Dollywood had been on our radar for a few years. The attractions are comprised of roller coasters and other carnival rides (e.g., carousels, spinning tea cups, …) as well as many dining and shopping options. The site is kind of folded into a hollow, so navigating it is a little strange, but not horrible.
A friend of my son studied roller coaster design in college, and he said Dollywood was a good choice for riding. I have to agree. There were quite a few that ranged from very docile to “I’m-so-not-doing-that”. I draw the line at inversion. I have learned I don’t enjoy being upside down. Diana can’t take much at all from movement rides without getting sick. She did one and was OK. I did another and told her it should be ok. It was OK until nearly the end when the coaster had a couple of quick side-to-side movements. That did her in. No more coasters.
We also had fun checking out displays of Dolly Parton‘s life and some of her many costumes from various movies and performances. She is the real deal.
More Than Just Rides
Beyond rides, there were shows and lots of shops, and food. Food pricing varied greatly. I found a spot making a really good smoked brisket sandwich for a reasonable price, so I was a happy camper. We also saw people standing in line for the Dollywood Cinnamon Bread. After Diana overheard someone talking about how great the bread was, Diana had to get some.
One of the highlights for me was a ride on a steam train that ran frequently throughout the day. It was pretty cool do see it out there working its way around the park. Authenticity was demonstrated via the soot I collected on my bare arms and clothes. Some things are just worth it.
Tuner Cars
Back on the topic of that expensive hotel room, it seems the weekend starting on Friday was the kick off of a huge tuner car event, Slammedenuff, at the Pigeon Forge Convention Center. Tuner cars are kind of today’s lowriders. These sports cars and sedans are lowered, wheels have unreal camber, they are totally tricked out, and they have really loud, modified exhaust systems.
We had been seeing a steadily growing number of them in the area, even as we arrived the prior Monday. We met one of the owners in our hotel parking lot, and he showed us his car and told us how he trailered it with his family to be there. Over the week, more cars streamed in until the roads and parking lots were packed with these loud rods cruising all over.
We decided to come to the show on Sunday from Knoxville, about an hour away. Traffic was bad, and Diana couldn’t get event tickets, even though plenty were available the day before. Apparently, things got out of hand in some of the parking lots the night before, and the local authorities shut it all down and not so politely told everyone to leave town. Slammedenuff was over and wasn’t welcome back. Given how many we saw on the street, I wonder what we missed.
Southern Food
One spot I liked dining at is called the Local Goat. They had a really large menu. So, we started with a beer cheese dip and a full rack of ribs to share. We were no match for the ribs, which were huge. We wound up sharing the leftovers for dinner in our hotel another night.
When we returned and got shut out of Slammedenuff, we headed to a huge diner-themed restaurant we kept passing. There was plenty of kitsch, but the food was just ok. Still, we had fun walking through the packed parking lot for one last look at some of those tuner cars.
What convention do you want to attend?
